TREAT HIM LIKE A KING AND HE LL TREAT YOU LIKE A QUEEN

I am a firmm believer that what you give is what you get in return as far as human behavior is concerned. So if you are a good wife to your husband and treat him right, he will cherish, love, and nurture you in return.

Want to know how to keep your husband happy? Herei ll talk aboiut  qualities a man looks for in his wife.

Be pleasant. As mentioned already, we should treat others the way we want to be treated. That being said, never be rude to your husband, family, and friends. Try to be warm, kind, positive, understanding, and friendly. Actively work to be pleasant toward your husband. Don’t be that person who lashes out at others because you had a bad day. Welcome your husband with a smile when he comes home. A good wife honors her hubby by keeping a pleasant tone in her voice, a happy smile on her face, and a neat and clean appearance. Listen to him talk about his day, especially if it was a difficult one. If you don't like how your partner treats you, take a minute to observe how you treat your partner and try correct your behavior.Treat him with respect. If you expect respect from others. we need to treat others in return with respect too. Haven’t we all heard "Give respect and take respect?" Respect can be reflected in the way one talks and behaves. Always speak in a loving way and refrain from speaking in a harsh manner. A good wife respects her hubby. She never chooses to belittle, strike, humiliate, or otherwise harm him in private or in public. It is better to watch what you say and think before speaking, as it is not possible to take back the words once they are said. A good wife will treat her man with respect in front of others and at home.

  Communicate. Communication is the key to a good and solid marriage. Do not hide things or keep secrets from your husband. Be honest. Find time to sit and talk with him on a daily basis, even if it is for only half an hour. If you let things bottle up and feel that you cannot share with your husband, then your marriage is in trouble. Be a good listener. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but allow him to talk first. Don't greet him with complaints and problems the moment he comes back from work. Good communication also helps to build trust and strengthen your relationship. The wife and husband are a team or partners. Do not make any major decisions about the family without consulting with husband. Fights or problems may happen, but do not let the world know about it. Rather, you should try to solve it between yourselves as partners. The fight you had last week over shopping or whatever is over and done with. So try to move on with it and stop rehashing the past and reminding him of his faults. Do not resort to name calling, hitting, spitting, breaking dishes, or anything else when you lose your temper. If you do, he may actually start to fall out of love with you and you could lose him all together. Always communicate with words and a calm mind. Breathe before you decide to act on your temper

.Be supportive. A husband expects his wife’s support and understanding, especially in troubled. A good wife loves her hubby for his successes and failures, and provides reassurance when he's feeling down. She is a nurturer and an equal partner in the marriage. Support him in all stages of his career and life. Do not belittle your man or hurt his ego. It is often said that "a wife can make or break a man." There’s no quicker way to build resentment in your man than to criticize him or belittle him, especially in front of others. Be proud of him on his accomplishments and genuinely compliment him. You can then expect him to behave in return in the same manner and also respect you more for your support and thoughtfulness. If you don’t agree with him, respectfully let him know you don’t agree with a healthy conversation

.Do not nag. No man likes a nagging wife. Ask him nicely. Many wives think that nagging is the only way to get her husband to do things. The truth is that your nagging can create an unwanted rift, or can make things worse between the two of you. Your husband is a grown man with his own thoughts and desires. Just because you think he should be doing something particular doesn't mean he has to do it.

Give him his space. As a wife, it's important to understand that your husband has a life that's more than you. He has a family, friends, and colleagues who are also part of his life. He also may have hobbies and passions he is involved in. Don’t expect his undivided attention at all times. Don’t stop him if he wants to go out and hang out with his friends sometimes or engage in a hobby or sport that he likes. An interfering wife can sometimes be very irritating.

Keep him happy in bed. Sexual intimacy is one of the most essential things in any marriage. When you please your man, he will be obliged to please you in return. Please your man in bed. If you cannot keep your man happy in bed, he may go where he can get it elsewhere. After all, a man is a man! According to research, one major reason why men cheat is mostly physical, whereas for a woman it is emotional.

Plan surprises. Men like surprises too. It can be anything, from organizing his birthday party without him knowing about it or planning a special night of passion by playing a seductress. Your surprises do not have to be elaborate and can be as simple as making him his favorite snack or any of his favorite dishes once in a while, even if you would rather eat something else

.Express your love and appreciation often.Men likes praises and appreciation. Make the most of your time together. Men like to hear the words "I love you" too. Also, try to join him in activities that he's interested in, even if you prefer to do something else. Give him a thoughtful gift once in a while. Make it a point never to forget the special days in his life. Pamper him often, especially when he is home. You can cook for him or give him a massage. Making him dependent on you by doing his chores when he is at home is not a bad idea either. Let him miss you and think about you when you are not around. These gestures won’t go unnoticed, and it may even inspire him to do something nice for you. Don't withhold affection.

Be honest, loyal, and dedicated. A good wife is honest, loyal, and dedicated to her husband. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, and the vows you have taken at the time of marriage should be kept up at all times.Keep up your health and appearance. A good wife honors her hubby by keeping a pleasant tone in her voice, a happy smile on her face, and a neat and clean appearance.

Take special care of your appearance, not just for him but for yourself. Include exercises or yoga in your daily routine to stay healthy. Be hygienic. Some woman feel that once they are married why they should dress up or take care of their appearance — this isn't true, and if you do it you should also do it because it makes yourself feel good too and that makes your husband happy also. A man also likes his wife to smell good. If you are unhealthy or not presentable, your man may start looking elsewhere.

Maintain the house. Maintain a clean house all the time. Clear away the clutter and spend time decorating the house. Apart from this, be wise with money and take all the responsibilities of a wife seriously without complaining too much.

Do you want a good husband who will love and cherish you? Then treat him exactly the way you want him to treat you. If you want your husband to treat you like a queen, you should treat him like a king. In this modern world where most wives also work, the above advice may not be fully practical. But at least some effort can be put into exercising these tips in practice. If you are working, you may want to hire a maid to take care of the household chores of cooking, cleaning, and so forth.

I am sure any man would be happy to get a good wife with all the above-listed qualities. Also, I have some advice for the men who were overjoyed seeing this article. Remember: Marriage is a two-way street, there are two people in this relationship, and you have to play your role as well if you expect your wife to be an ideal one.

Have I left anything out? Please feel free to do what you thinks works too that i ve not talked about.

SET HIM FREE.

LADIES... I've finally realized a lot thru my years and many relationships that just haven't worked... some not my fault.. some were.. but what I've realized is this..

You cant make a man stay.. worldly or Godly men are men and once their mind is made up.. they are leaving it's just a matter of time. You cant change a mans mind. If he wants to go LET HIM. Holding onto him is just causing yourself more pain. TRUST ME.. 

Begging a man to stay is showing him that you can be an option if what he's leaving you for doesn't work out. That you will be there if what he's chasing fails. It leaves you hurting and vulnerable and if you do take him back he will just leave you again for another option. It's not fair dont do it. Dont beg a man to stay. If he wants to go let him go. 

I know they say fight for what you want, BUT if what you want doesn't want to be fought for.. DONT FIGHT .. why fight a battle that you cant win. LOOK I know it sounds all romantic and right to say I fought for this with everything I have but he isn't gonna respect that. LET HIM GO...

Relationships are hard and if both parties aren't willing to fight for what God has brought together then LET IT GO.. it is true that any door God has opened man cant shut BUT God doesn't force us to be in relationships actually he doesn't force us to do anything... what he does is give up the chance... if a man doesn't want to make it work.. sorry sis.. GOD ISN'T GONNA FORCE HIM you have to just LET HIM GO... 

No woman wants to hear this.. she wants to hear it's gonna be okay.. it's gonna work out just keep fighting... WHY? WHY fight for something that is not in your hands?? If he wants to go just let him go. SIS it will save you heartache in the long run. The momentary heartache it hurts it really does because you gave so much of yourself and you feel like how could he walk away if he loves me. Doesn't he understand how bad it hurts. MOST LIKELY no he doesn't.. that's why it's so easy for him to turn around and walk away... 

If a man wants to go let him and dont sit around waiting for him to come back. He's not sitting around waiting on you. NO he's out living and loving.. so it's your turn go live and love.. dont lose yourself in a man. Men are temporary God is forever... God will fix your broken heart and eventually it wont hurt anymore and you will move on... 

Maybr he s just an asshole.why are you trying to remind him about moments you both shared? He doesnt have ammnesiaand he s not in coma ,he remebers..its just not good reason for him to stay.

He knows how good and loving a woman you are.he was there with you.he wasnt in coma was he?  So why beg him to stay?

If he wants to leave because of another woman or because he wants freedom or maybe he thinks the grass is greener in the other side..fine.why do you want to waste your time and pearla of wosdom with an idiot? He knws all these 

What more do you need to know?
Like i said  always remeber men are TEMPORARY only GOD iis forever

JUST WORDS OF ADVICE FROM MEEE
Have a nice day.

YOU CAN'T FORCE HIM TO CHANGE.

Today’s topic is all about change! Ladies, have you ever met that man and all you can say is “ Damn, he would be a good man only if..?” If he wasn’t such a womanizer, more caring, more giving, not so uptight, etc. One thing I’ve learned is that people will change because of one or two reasons; when there are ready to change or when they are forced to change. Example, if a man gets tired of sleeping with different women every night and having meaningless sex then he will eventually change his habits. If a man loses something that he really, truly cares about but doesn’t realizes it until after the fact, then he is forced to change, that’s if he doesn’t want the same results. Because only a fool continues to do the same thing and expect a different result!

Sometimes we have to let people learn and grow on their own and from their own mistakes and stop trying to force people to change. The bottom line is; if they don’t change for themselves then it’s just a temporary fix to a lifetime problem. Now, if a man truly wants to change then he will change when he is ready to change, not because someone else wants him to change.

Unfortunately, most people, especially men, don’t change until something detrimental in their life happens that forces them to change. If you have a man who is constantly throwing shade to those who he thinks is not on his level because they don’t roll like he roll, with the fancy car, big house, flashy clothes and the women, when he loses his job or doe and can no longer afford those fancy cars, clothes and women, he will think twice before he throw shade again. This kind of thing can change a man’s perception on life. Or, if you have a man who takes his wife for granted until she finally leaves him, that will make him think twice about what’s important to him and what is a priority to him in life.

Bottom line is, you can’t make or force a person to change. A person has to change on their own and at their own pace. So you should either accept or reject that person as is, if you don’t have the patience to wait for them to change on their own. One thing for sure, two things for certain, if he really cares about you he will change own his own to keep you or he will be forced to change after you leave his ass because you had enough of his crap!!

I'm just saying.
So..why not quit trying to change him....work on yourself to be the right woman..so iif he looses you...you ll be perfect for the right man.
Have a nice day.

BREAK UP DOES NOT MEAN THE END OF YOUR LIFE.

Why that break up is  not the end of your life.

1. The sun still shines.

Life isn’t ending. Every day you wake up and there is a new day with new people waiting for you to have new experiences. The sun still rises and the sun still sets, life isn’t over and you can’t keep acting like it is. Trust me, life has just begun.

2. There are 7 billion people in the world.

You’re going to let ONE ruin your day? Ruin your mood? There are too many different people in this world who can change your life in so many different positive ways to let one negative, sad excuse for a soul disrupt how much you enjoy everyday life.

3. He isn’t worth it.

No man should ever make you sad. Yeah, they make you angry, they disappoint you, they confuse you but none should ever make you sad. And men who do? Really aren’t worth it. He fooled you, he played you like a fiddle but it’s his loss. Just think about all the men out there waiting to make you happy instead. This stupid one is definitely not worth it.

4. He’s a jerk.

If you’re not worth his time, why should he even be worth your thoughts? Face it, if he “doesn’t know” if he wants you, he’s probably got another girl wrapped around him helping him figure it out or he’s just making sure you don’t move on first. People go after what they want.

5. He’s got a rock for a heart and you don’t.

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You love. And that’s good. Loving with all of your heart is something to be proud of. Who cares if you spent that love on the wrong person for a little while? One day someone is not only going to deserve all that love but also know how to handle it AND love you the same way. How awesome will that be?

6. You’re pretty.

WELL, YOU ARE. And pretty girls don’t cry (in public). You’re beautiful, inside and out. You can’t blame yourself or judge yourself based on someone else’s actions. You have to know that this happened for a reason. You, you pretty girl you, you deserve better. You deserve to smile. You deserve to have fun and you deserve someone who enhances your life. Not someone who brings you down.

7. You’re probably remembering the past much better than it actually was.

Life is great and the relationship you guys had might have been too. But in reality, how great could it have been if it led you to where you are right now? It’s okay to see the good but don’t ignore the bad. Your future is going to be
INCREDIBLE, with or without Mr. Awful.

8. You’re bigger than all of this.

You have so much going for you. Focus on the people in your life who encourage you to reach those goals and fill your life with endless support and positive energy in whatever it may be. Those are the people who will be there for you, by your side through the good and the bad. Those are the people who are going to love you no matter what. Those are the people who make everything okay.

9. I really don’t know for sure.

I can’t convince you with just 8 reasons that life goes on and you deserve to be happy. It’s up to you. You have to wake up every single morning and decide to be happy or decide to do something about not being happy. Life is about going after what you want, realizing what and who is truly important and living each second to the fullest. So take a chance. Dye your hair, eat that chocolate bar, skip class and go to the beach, talk to that guy at the bar. Do something crazy.

Because whether or not it works out, whether or not you know exactly where you’re supposed to be in life right now… I can promise that in the end, you are going to be more than okay. 

R

DONT BE HIS NEXT VICTIM.

Narcissists men are completely self-absorbed and are oblivious to the wants and needs of others. They enter into relationships in an attempt to fill this void and to make sure that they have someone who is always available for sex, an ego stroke or whatever need they may have. A relationship with a Narcissist always follows three phases, the over-evaluations phase, the devaluation phase and the discard phase.

The Over-evaluation Phase

A Narcissist is very careful when choosing a target. Typically, they will choose a victim based on their status. They must be attractive, popular, rich or extremely gifted in some area. The greater the status, the higher the value the Narcissist places on the Supply derived.

Once a target has been chosen, it’s almost like the Narcissist gets tunnel vision. They are hyper-vigilant in their pursuit and will project the perfect image that their victim wants them to be. They are excessively caring, loving and attentive at this stage. They shower their targets with attention, compliments and literally sweep them off their feet.

They place their target on a pedestal, idolize and worship them. Their target is the greatest thing since sliced bread. Here the Narcissist is ecstatic, full of hopes and dreams. They will talk and think about them constantly, they are euphoric. This is as close as a Narcissist will ever get to feeling love. This kind of idolization is what others would call infatuation.

The victim is likely so caught up in all the attention and is usually thinking at this point, that they have found their soul-mate. Their pursuer is exactly what they want in a partner (because the Narcissist is mirroring what they have learned appeals to their target) and they can’t believe how lucky they are and that this catch is still single.

What they don’t know, or could ever be prepared for, is what comes next.

The Devaluation Stage

The Over-Evaluation phase, if you’re dealing with a Somatic Narcissist, usually lasts anywhere from a few weeks to a couple of months, just long enough for the Narcissist to be confident that they have secured their target’s love and devotion. Unbeknownst to the target, what they were witnessing in the early phase was the Narcissist’s false self. In this second phase, the mask comes off and the Narcissist starts to reveal their true colours.

The shift could be gradual or almost seemingly overnight. Suddenly the attention they so lavishly gave you is gone and replace by indifference and silence. Days or weeks could go by and you won’t hear from them. They don’t return your phone calls, they don’t keep a single promise and you’re starting to suspect that they might be involved with someone else. The target is left baffled and confused and wondering what they did wrong to cause such an abrupt turnaround.

Narcissists become bored easily and what usually starts happening in their heads at this stage, is that the void begins to emerge again. The high they were feeding off of is waning and they begin to question your worthiness, that perhaps you weren’t so special after all, because if you were then the void wouldn’t still be there.

They become moody and agitated easily, blaming you for even the slightest transgression. They start to disappear more frequently and they give you the silent treatment in an attempt to create distance. As the Narcissist withdraws, the target starts to cling and your demands for his attention and your need to understand what’s happening, grate on his nerves. The harder you cling the more the Narcissist pulls away. They start to blame and criticize the target for everything, treating them like an emotional punching bag.

At this point the target is an emotional wreck. The Narcissist has left without any explanation and they can’t figure out how one minute they were put on a pedestal and now it’s like they doesn’t even exist. The Narcissist is a projector and they are projecting their emotional turmoil onto you. They feed off of other people’s misery (as long as it’s caused by them) just as much as they feeds off of your admiration, either way it makes no difference to them.

It is this person, this cruel, indifferent, unfeeling, sadist that is the behind the mask. Most targets desperately try to find the one they fell in love with. What they don’t realize is that that person never existed. They were a facade an act put on by the Narcissist to secure their Supply.

The Narcissist will take no responsibility for their actions, because they simply don’t care how they’ve treated you or how you are feeling.
Narcissists are not capable of forming normal healthy attachments to people. Those that aren’t familiar with the disorder are completely at a loss to understand how unnecessarily cruel their behavior can be. The target was never more than an object to the Narcissist, whose usefulness is on the decline.

The Narcissist isn’t one to throw away a potential piece of supply though. They will keep up this I love you, I love you not charade going for as long as it suits them or as long as you allow it. They will breeze in and out of your life as if nothing ever happened, completely oblivious and indifferent to your suffering.

This mind fuck is deliberate and they will keep feeding you crumbs of attention, just enough to keep you emotionally invested and available to cater to their every need.

At some point one of two things will happen: either they will find a new target and begin phase one with them, thus ignoring you completely, or you will have had enough of his psychotic abuse and you will take control and put an end to it, thus ushering In phase three.

The Discard Phase

It is almost baffling to watch the ease at which a Narcissist can pull away from his partners. Many targets are left asking themselves, “Did he ever love me? Did I mean anything to him?” The simple answer is no. No one means anything to him. Women are only a means to an end – to obtain the much needed Narcissistic Supply. Once your usefulness has run its course, you will be discarded abruptly and cruelly, without warning.

Trying to get over a relationship with a Narcissist is extremely difficult. Once it is over the target is usually an emotional wreck, whose self-esteem has been annihilated by the persistent demeaning behavior, insults and cruelty of the Narcissist. Depending on when they were able to break free, the target maybe a shadow of their former self, with a lot of work ahead of them to rebuild their shattered self-image.

As a victim tries to pick up the pieces, What must be remembered is that you were deliberately targeted, lied to and manipulated by a skilled con-artist, for their own gain. There was nothing you could have done differently and none of this was your fault. The Narcissist will repeat this pattern with every person, every time, bar none.

All former targets must be vigilantly on guard, because a Narcissist always reserves the right to revisit a former source of supply, no matter how much time has passed or how badly they’ve behaved.

Once you have broken free you must close the door on any and all contact, because if you don’t you’re headed back to a watered down version of Phase One – over and over and over again.

YOU ARE NOT READY.

It doesn’t matter how many times you complain to anyone who will listen about how you are ready for love and want to date someone.  Just because you bitch about it doesn’t mean it comes true.

Honestly, talk is cheap.

It gets you absolutely nowhere unless you plan on actually doing something to make it happen.  And by doing, I don’t mean signing up for every dating site, going to every event until you exhaust yourself or announcing to every friend that you are single and pushing them to set you up.  That is exhausting and not worth your time if you don’t have your shit together in the first place so that if someone great shows up you even know what to do with it!

Am I right?

HERE ARE SIGNS YOU ARE NOT READY FOR LOVE.

1.  You don’t like anything.

You know what I am talking about.
You are the one at the party pointing out bad outfits and talking about how you loathe the music.

At work you are always complaining about your co-workers and boss.
Your last five dates were “atrocious!”

A few people out there may think your snark and dark side is funny but you and I know the truth, Sugarpants.
Your self esteem is struggling and when you point out everyone else’s failings you think people won’t notice yours. You might be able to keep that disguise around work or even some friends, but love is not going to fall for it.

HERE IS THE HARD TRUTH.  When you are like that, the translation to other people is, “what does she actually think about me?” A new wonderful date after laughing a few times is going to start wondering what things you are going to nit pick about them.  And ultimately, anyone who is healthy is not falling for your act.

When you like yourself it shows through the way you move in this world.  In the way you are kind, accepting of others, understanding that everyone is fighting their own battle, realizing that the best thing about life is that everyone is different.  That doesn’t mean you don’t get to have a little snark, it just means it isn’t constantly focused at others.

Because honestly,  you just look like an asshole.  Nobody wants to date an asshole.

2.  You are uncomfortable with someone liking you

You meet someone.
They are awesome, until…..they start to like you.

Oh fuck.

They are doing everything that they are supposed to be doing and it feels super duper uncomfortable.  You start looking for excuses to get out of it.  You start to look for stupid things that don’t really matter to talk you out of it.

They are being too pushy.  Too clingy.  Too nice.  
You and I both know this is bullshit, so let’s stop pretending that it isn’t.

HERE IS THE HARD TRUTH:  If you do not like yourself very much, when someone starts to like you it doesn’t make sense.  It doesn’t compute in your brain.  You learned that love looks a certain way (maybe not a healthy one) and it isn’t matching up in your head.

This is where you have to check yourself before you wreck yourself.
If good people liking you makes you feel uncomfortable and you sabotage it, you need to step up and take care of that shit because that isn’t magically going to go away.  You are just going to keep dating people who are comfortable and probably unhealthy.

No one’s goal is “Let’s have a mediocre, unhealthy relationship that is really hard and makes me feel like shit most days!”  No one.

3.  You have zero idea what you need

AAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Sorry I needed to get that off my chest, because you are killing me, Smalls.

I can guarantee what you are looking for is what I call an “evolved relationship.”  Something much more than your parents or grandparents, fed to us by media and an overall drive towards self awareness.  I am no way saying these are bad things, but to have a relationship like this you need to KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU NEED!!

NOT WANT.  

HERE IS THE HARD TRUTH:   Throw away the three page list about the qualities of your soulmate.  That shit is degrading to the future person that is choosing to love you, show up every day and be great for you.

Instead, work on what you need.  To feel good.  Thrive.  Learn how to be your best self.  Learn new perspectives.  Love in a huge way.

Recently I was quoted this:

“Unless it’s mad, passionate, extraordinary love, It’s a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldn’t be one of them.”  – Dream for an Insomniac

We change lives just because we are loved.

This kind of love does not come from fairy dust nor does it just happen to lucky people.  It comes from doing smart but rewarding self-work up front so you canCREATE that kind of love and relationship.

So I ask you, are you ready?  Love is waiting for you to catch up. 
Have a nice day.

SHE ONLY WANT'S YOUR MONEY.

Women suck off of men and men suck off of women. Sometimes men even suck off of men and women suck off of women. Right now, I am going to focus on a woman sucking off of a man by giving you signs she’s dating you for your money. If you are a guy that is reading this, then you need to pay close attention to what I am telling you right now.ladies..forgive me..(lol)

1. SHE HAS EXPENSIVE TASTE

Even though she does not make very much money, it seems she has a lot of expensive stuff sitting around her house. Is this signs that she has used a guy before? However you stack it, if that girl has expensive taste, then you better watch that wallet and watch for those puppy eyes!

2   SHE THINKS OF DATE OUT AS SHOPPING

When you ask her where she would like to go, she tells you that she wants to be shopping. Now, I am all for shopping and taking the #guy around too, but if you are the one that is paying, then she is definitely using you for your money

3    SHE ASKS YOU FOR MONEY

Okay, she just comes out and asks you for money. I think it is okay to ask for money if she is in dire need for rent or something, but if she is constantly doing it, then you need to find out how to draw the line.

4. YOU HAVE TO PAY BEFORE YOU CAN PLAY

No, I’m not saying she is a prostitute, but I guess in a way, she is if you have to pay before you can play. Before you are able to have sex with her, you have to buy her something that is expensive. I know, this is sad, but there are#people out there like this.

5  EMPER TANTRUM

When you decline from giving her money or buying her something that she wants, she gives you a temper tantrum. Wow, shouldn’t she leave those tantrums for the kids in the back seat on the way home from the toy store? She becomes so angry over every little thing.

6   SHE’S CURIOUS ABOUT YOUR MONEY STATUS

When you go on a date, she asks you about your money status. #Boy, she is fishing in your finances. If you have a lot of money, she is going to show a lot of interest in you. Why is this? It’s because she likes money!

7  YOU JUST HAVE THAT FEELING

I always say that you should trust your gut instinct as it always knows best. When someone is only dating you for your money, you can just feel it.

These are my signs she’s dating you for your money. If she is dating you for your #money, then you need to do something about it. You can’t continue living and letting her suck off of you. So, do you know of any other #signs? Do you have experience with this?
 
Have a nice day...

NO FINANCE NO ROMANCE..(REALITY CHECK)

Is it right to say that love doesn’t cost a thing, or is love doesn’t pay the bills more appropriate? How important is financial status in love?

Love is a matter of the heart, so what has the wallet got to do with it?

The answer is, a lot. People can argue over whether financial status is important in a relationship, and the fact that people still disagree on this issue after all this time just goes to showhow important money is in relationships.

The subject of finances will always come up in a relationship. It’s hard to be in love with someone if neither of you can pay the rent or put food on the table. The question isn’t really whether it matters or not, because it does.

People should be asking themselves about how much it really matters to them. It’s easy for people to say that they don’t care about how much money a prospective partner makes, but that’s never entirely true no matter how sincere they sound.

Not to sound skeptical or anything, but people do care, and they should care, especially if you’re looking at the long-term potential of a relationship. Traditional wedding vows include the phrase “for richer or for poorer”. It means you promise to love a person when times are good and you will keep loving a person when times are bad.

This is a definite statement and it’s something that should be honored when you marry someone. However, when you’re still in the process of looking for someone you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, richer is a better option than poorer.

Let’s face it, it is very rare for someone to knowingly enter into a relationship with someone who won’t help you provide for your future family. This is proven by the large amount of couplesbreaking upbecause of financial troubles.

This doesn’t just apply to women anymore. In this day and age, both parties share the responsibilities of paying the bills and providing for the family, and therefore people look for someone who is equal to or higher than them in the financial ladder.

Why Financial Status Matters to Women

Not all women see men as walking wallets, but if they will entrust their hearts and their lives to a man, they need to know that someone’s going to take care of their needs.

A lot of independent-minded women actually keep a separate bank account to make sure that they are financially secure in the odd chance that they may have to leave their partners for whatever reason.

A guy doesn’t have to be filthy rich to get a girl to go out with him or marry him. He just needs to be responsible with his money and he has to have a steady job and the resourcefulness to find ways to pay for the necessities, and then some.

Of course, there are the occasional gold diggers who care more about the status of a man’s finances than anything else about their potential partner, but men should take note that these women comprise only a small part of the female population.

Wanting a good life for themselves and their children (present or future) doesn’t automatically make a woman a gold digger. It makes her smart.

Why Financial Status Matters to Men

Since they are expected to be the “providers”, men enjoy the luxury of following their hearts more than women do, but this doesn’t mean they don’t care about the financial status of the women they date. Men consider financial status not because of necessity, but for more superficial reasons.

Men who have money tend to gravitate to women who would boost their worth in society. By choosing a woman who comes with money as well, they are able to maintain a good image in their social circle.

Men in middle and lower income brackets also tend to choose women who are financially independent. These women usually don’t require much from their partners financially because they can provide for themselves up to some extent and every small thing their man shells out money for is greatly appreciated.

Usually, a woman who spends a lot of money raises a red flag for a lot of men as they don’t know if they can keep up and support the woman’s spending habits.

There are gold diggers among men as well, although they’re not as easily spotted as their female counterparts.

Falling in love is a wonderful feeling, but once money problems surface, it’s safe to expect for love to fade. Sure, there are people who still stick to the “for richer or poorer” vow, but sooner or later financial issues can and will take its toll on a relationship..

Thats the FACT.

THANK THE PERSON WHO BROKE YOUR HEART

If  you're human, there is a good chance you've had your heart broken before -- and you've probably broken a few hearts along the way too.

People are constantly saying that getting your heart broken is the worst thing to ever happen and I really can't sit here and disagree. I've been there and it sucks. But you know what? We're all better people thanks to this horrible, unavoidable feeling.

When I initially got my heart broken, I would have never opted for the "I'm going to be a better person after this" excuse. Instead, I wanted to lay under my covers, cry and stalk my ex on all forms of social media until I fell asleep, only to wake up and cry some more. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to know what I had done wrong. How could this hurt so bad? What did I do to deserve that?

Looking back, I realize that the answer is nothing. I had done nothing. Break-ups and heartbreaks are essentially a part of life that everyone has to deal with at one point or another. Eventually, those feelings of hate, sadness and self-pity went away. They faded with time as if it never happened. Without defeats, we would never know victories. Without being at our lowest low's, our highest high's wouldn't seem as amazing.

What I'm trying to say here is, with heartbreak comes growth. Out of those dark times we all experience will emerge a stronger, more confident, more independent, self-loving person. Sometimes we get so caught up in the hurt, we forget to be grateful for the type of person that came out of it.

Here are reasons to thank the person who broke your heart.

1. For exposing you to what else life has to offer.

Relationships often have a way of making us close-minded individuals. We cling to that person we are with and forget about the world surrounding us. After a break-up, we are forced to open our eyes and see that life is happening, all day every day, and it is our choice to seize the moment or get left in the dust.

2. For preparing you for "next time."

It's true when they say "the first cut is the deepest." Going through your very first heartbreak is an incomparable feeling. It rips all the hopes and dreams you created your entire life right out from under you, leaving you empty

After going through it initially, you become stronger and better off for the next time. You'll know how to handle it, just how many quarts of ice cream you'll need and how to easily pick up the pieces and move on.

3. For allowing you to find yourself.

I know when I was in a relationship that ended in heartbreak, I always thought of myself as "me and ____". I rarely ever thought about what I wanted or what I needed on an individual basis. It was always about solely them or both of us.

After getting my heart broken, I was able to find myself. I discovered what I liked on my own and what I didn't like. It was motivation for me to become the best version of myself, to prove I was going to become a better person after this. I ultimately learned who I was.

4. For shining light on the  relationship

Love is blind. Blinder than just about anything. It often allows us to get caught up in the feelings and leaves us forgetting the reality. After a heartbreak, you are able to take a step back from the relationship, as an outsider, and realize what was wrong and what never worked. This becomes a growing process for future relationships, giving us the opportunity to not make the same mistakes time and time again.

5. For loving you.

Everyone wants to be loved. No matter how the story ends, you'll always have the story. Love comes and goes in the blink of an eye and you'll probably have your heart broken many, many times before finding the one. But in the time you spent with this person, you laughed, you cried and you made memories. Memories you'll have for the rest of your life. Be grateful.

I believe it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all,right?

Have a nice day

YOU CAN'T FORCE LOVE.

Sometimes it can be quite difficult to not force something when we want it badly; but forcing someone to be in a relationship or love you is a recipe for total disaster. Surprisingly, some people don’t even realize when they’re forcing love. They go through the motions, making excuses for why the other person isn’t reciprocating their actions. The reality is if you are always on the giving in of love and never receiving it, it may not exist in the other person.

Today as you read.lets find out maybe you are forcing love or a relationship that is not meant to be..

1 You Do All The Planning

Date #1…Your idea. Date #2…You asked him out. Every other plan has been made by you. He simply accepts, and at times declines, your invitation. However, he never makes the arrangements. If he wants to see you, allow him to make arrangements some times. It can very well be a case of him not having to do anything because he knows that you will take care of it. So to be on the safe side, allow him to have an equal say in when the two of you see each other. If he doesn’t initiate a date or make time to see you, then don’t force the issue.

2  You Always Have To Ask How He Feels ALL THE TIME

If you’re constantly doing a ‘how do you feel about me?’ check with your significant other, either he doesn’t’ care to share, doesn’t’ know, or doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. Either way it’s the signs of an unhealthy relationship. When you’re unsure of how your man feels about you and he never cares to share, it’s important to not make up feelings for him that actually don’t exist.

3  He Never Mentions Your Future

You’ve mentioned marriage. He’s said nothing. You’ve mentioned having kids. He gives you a blank stare. If he never mentions a future with you, he may not have thoughts of a future with you.

4 
He Disregards Serious Matters

Unless you’re dating a child and not a grown man, at times your relationship will call for serious conversations and he should be ready to discuss the matters at hand. By nature, women may want to ‘talk’ more than men, but if he’s always changing the subject when you’re talking about your future, how to make your relationship better, or anything that calls for a serious tone, you may want to evaluate the relationship.

5  You Hear No More Than Yes

No one likes to feel rejected, especially if the rejection is coming from someone that you care about. If you’re in a relationship and you’re constantly met by rejection, it may be time to reevaluate the situation. If your significant other is not willing to compromise or at least allow you to have things your way sometimes his “no’s” may say a lot about how he feels about the relationship.

6  You Initiate The Communication 80 % Of The Time

If it were up to you, the two of you would talk multiple times a day. If it were up to him, he would be fine speaking to you once or twice a week. If you find yourself being the only one  sending good morning or goodnight texts or the only one in the relationship doing a ‘just checking on you’ call, you may be forcing something that is not really there. If a man wants to speak to you, he will make time; and keep in mind just because he answers your calls doesn’t mean that he can’t live without you. If he’s just as serious about you as you are about him, he would initiate texts or call more.

Have a nice day.
Remember to check out radioqueenshow on you tube.

Watch radioqueenshow episode 8 Nigerian.Wedding between ayomikun and olawale..(Mr and mrs olufowobi)
https://youtu.be/HptSqBbMSe8

KISSING

kissing is the favorite universal act of showing love and affection. Almost everyone receives or gives a kiss at some point in their life. A kiss can be placed on any part of the body

Do you know these type of kisses?

1 The Forehead Kiss – The forehead kiss usually means that you are just friends. Depending on how it is planted, it can also be used as a means of showing deep affection to a loved one. Most people use use it as a starter kiss when they meet someone new, to express that they like them.

2 The Eskimo Kiss – It is commonly used by children and parents as an indication of affection. It involves rubbing your nose against your loved nose back and forth. This type of kiss has its origin from the Eskimo, hence the name Eskimo kiss.

3 The French Kiss – The French is considered most popular romantic kiss. A kiss is named ‘French kiss’ when a person’s tongue touches another person’s tongue. This is why it is also known as tongue kissing. This type of kiss is very easy to execute but it may take years to master.

4 The Single-Lip Kiss – This type of kiss involves gently sucking another person’s lip. To give your partner a single-lip kiss, you have to take any one of their lips sandwiched between yours and suck gently. If done in the correct manner, this kiss can send a strong romantic signal to you partner.

5 The Hand Kiss – It is given by gently grasping someone’s hand by the fingers and kissing the back side. The hand kiss demonstrates respect, adoration and kindness.

6 The Earlobe Kiss – It involves taking someone’s earlobe between the lips and tugging gently upwards or downwards. This kiss can be made more intense by gently rubbing the tongue in a circular motion on the earlobe.

7 The Butterfly Kiss – This type of kiss involves getting close to someone so that your eyelashes touch. Just before kissing the lips, blink very fast so that eyelashes flatter very fast just like the butterfly wings. This type of kiss is usually done for fun.

8 The Upside-Down Kiss – This type of kiss originates from the Spiderman movie. it is a romantic kiss It is also known as the spiderman kiss. It involves kissing a person whose head is upside-down from yours. This way your bottom lip kisses their top lip and vice versa.

9 Lingering Lip Kiss – This is a closed mouth kiss that lasts for more than 20 seconds. The tongue is not involved in this kiss. Lingering lip kisses involve the lips only. This kiss serves as an indication of deep love
.
10 The Cheek Kiss – This is a closed mouth kiss on someone’s cheeks. This kiss can be used to flirt, to pass a friendly greeting or to say goodbye to someone you love.

11 The Peck – The peck is a short tight lipped kiss on the lips or cheeks. It is used as an expression of friendship. A peck can also spark romance between two people. If you don’t get over it, just make him/her your lover.

12 The Lip-Gloss Kiss – This is a fun kiss. It involves putting on a harmless amount of ChapStick or lip gloss on the lips and then rubbing it on your partner’s lips until they are also coated. It is recommended that you use a lip gloss that is sweet and flavored to surprise your partner.

13 Secret Message Kiss – This is basically a French kiss with a ‘secret message’. It involves spelling out a message to your partner in the in the middle of a French kiss. This kiss is useful if you want to pass a romantic message to your partner.

14 The Lizard Kiss – This kiss involves sticking your tongue in and out of your partner’s mouth. It is done in quick strokes. The lizard kiss is usually practiced just for fun.

15 The Air Kiss – The air kiss is used as a form of greeting to friends and family. It is done by resting your cheeks on or near someone’s cheeks and then producing a kissing sound.

16 The Angel Kiss – This kiss involves kissing someone gently on the eyelids or on a spot near the eyes using the lips. This type of kiss indicates deep affection and is mostly used when saying goodbye to someone or when waking up a loved one.

17 The Biting Kiss – This is an open mouthed kiss that incorporates the tongue just like the French kiss. The only difference between this kiss and the French kiss is the fact that the teeth are also put into use. The teeth gently grab your partners tongue as you kiss.

18 The Neck Kiss – As the name suggests, aeck kissing involves kissing someone’s neck. Most people love doing it after French kissing for a while. You have to learn to keep the saliva ‘light’ to execute this type of kiss perfectly. Use only your lips and do not suck hard to prevent you mouth from producing much saliva.

19 The Vampire Kiss – It is done for fun. This is a deep kiss on your partner’s neck. It also involves light biting and sucking. Some people might find this kiss not sexy, therefore it is important to find out whether your partner likes it or not.

20 The Jawline Kiss – It is done by people who are used to each other. You should never try this kiss on someone you just met. A jawline kiss is a firm kiss on the lower side of the jaw where the neck meets the jaw. It is usually fun to kiss someone’s jawline after having some intense French kissing.

21 The Teaser Kiss – This kiss begins from ahe forehead, to the lips and then down to the arms and hands. On reaching the hands, the sequence is reversed from the hands then up to the lips and forehead. This kiss can be quite useful if you want to turn on your partner and make them want more.

With all these types of kisses, kissing will never get boring. The most important thing is finding out the types of kisses that you and your partner enjoy.

PRIDE WILL RUIN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

It  is always good to have pride, I will never dispute that but there is such a thing as having too much pride. It’s great to “protect” yourself from others; however, when you find someone that truly loves you then it’s okay to let your guard down. It is okay to look within yourself and realize you don’t have control of the situation and in need of someone’s help. It is righteous to say sorry when you know you have hurt the other person or have been wrongful toward them.

Let’s discuss pride a little bit. What comes to mind when you think of the word pride or someone being prideful? Think about this for a few seconds. Okay… now this is what comes to my mind — I think the person is too weak to deal with pain so they protect themselves to appear strong. You may disagree with me, but think about it. Most people think that people with pride are strong people. People with pride cannot be torn down. They supposedly have great self-esteem, are always in control, don’t need help from anyone and are all powerful.

But ultimately we are all human. We all need help from time to time and we are not all powerful. As for overly prideful people, on the contrary, they only want to believe they have great self-esteem. If you pay attention closely they are not really on the up and up within themselves. People with too much pride often are holding things back and/or are hiding something that they wish not to reveal to anyone including their partner.

That’s why I say it is relationship suicide. If at any time in your life you should be able to let your hair down is when you are fortunate enough to find someone that loves you unconditionally that is not your blood. You are not giving your relationship a winning chance to survive if you are too prideful.

Prideful people think they can hold their own in relationships. Well if so then, why are they in a relationship? When you find someone you love you should want them to be a part of your team, not a part of what you say and what your ideals are.  As you know there is not an “i” in the word team, however, prideful people think there is. To find someone is to make that person your other half if you realize that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If you don’t believe that then you probably should be single and just satisfy your sexual needs from time to time.

If you find yourself as a prideful person then maybe you should back down a little in your relationships (friends as well) because pride makes you impatient, distrusting, and not accepting of those who do not ascribe to your philosophy, spiritual beliefs, psychological principles, and sociological mandates. And let me tell you nobody wants to deal with such drivel and if they do they won’t for long. It is absolutely frustrating and continuously irritating.

Pride will cause you to fail in every relationship because with such pride you will live a life of indifference, avoidance, and denial of the warning signs that what you believe yourself to be is not what you really are, which is quite sad.

So prideful people…

Wake up, be real, and take advantage of the love you have in life! Not everyone gets to be that blessed in life. Therefore, stop being cocky, accept other people’s feeling as real and justified, realize and come to terms with your weaknesses, know that you are not always right nor is your way the right way, your beliefs are your opinions, hardheaded, stubborn and overall deaf to the world in general. Snap out of it before you lose what could be the best thing that could happen to you in your life.

Remember you can ask questions via mail
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All conversations are confidential...
(A problem shared is at least half solved)
Have a nice day.

LOVE AND DOGS.

There's a good reason dogs have earned the title of Man's Best Friend. Our furry friends are awesome at relationships and can teach us a lot about how to improve our own love lives. Today i want to share  lessons about love that we can learn from dogs..yes...dogs.

1. Always Excited to See You

It doesn't matter what kind of day your dog had, when you walk through the front door that is the highlight of their day. You're the best part of their day, every day. Dogs don't need to unleash their baggage or grievances of the day on their loved ones.
A dog can be in a deep sleep, yet when you come home, they're wide-awake and excited to greet you. When is the last time you were happy to see the person who just woke you up from a peaceful slumber?

Dogs are always excited to see you and be with you. It doesn't matter if they were sleeping, playing with a toy, or had a lonely day curled up in bed all by themselves.

We often want to unleash the woes of our day on to our significant other as soon as we walk through the door. We want to tell them about the horrible traffic we just encountered or the ludicrous task our boss gave us. And we aren't always so happy to greet the person who just woke us up from a nap! But this is where we can take a cue from our pups.

We should be excited to see our significant other at the end of the day. We should be happy to make the most of our time together. We can focus less on complaining and more on what's important now, which is being back together.

2. Never Hold a Grudge

Dogs forgive instantly. You can discipline them and still be their favorite. They aren't overly sensitive. They don't hold onto things we did or ways we've wronged them in the past. They know you love them and that's what sticks with them most of all.

We can learn a lot about forgiveness from dogs. Dogs don't invest energy into harboring bitterness or resentment. We too can choose to invest our time and energy into moving on, which helps build a healthier relationship. A lot of us tend to keep checklists in our heads of ways our partner has hurt us. We harbor resentment. We remember.

Our relationships can improve if we are quicker to forgive. If we focus on the positive traits our significant other has and that they love us, we can move past arguments a lot quicker. See the good in your spouse, just like a dog sees the good in you.

3. Loyal to the Core

Dogs are born with a deep sense of loyalty. Dogs are fiercely devoted to their owners. They're faithful and committed to the relationship no matter what.

Sadly, our culture tends to value self interest over loyalty. People leave relationships once their spouse is no longer meeting their needs.People have an affair when someone else looks desirable. When relationships get too hard and people just move on.

We can learn so much about loyalty from dogs. We can choose to be fiercely devoted to our partners too, refusing to leave their sides. We can show the same kind of dedication and commitment to one another that dogs do to their masters. Dog owners know their dogs will be there for them. Relationships go to another level when our significant other knows we'll be there for them not matter what.

4. Love Unconditionally

Dogs don't keep a record of wrong or right. Their love doesn't shift based on good looks, financial position, or even how you've treated them that day. They don't have to make a conscious effort to love. They simply do.

To love unconditionally, means to love without conditions or circumstances: to love completely. Love is a choice, so what if we choose to love our significant other all the time, regardless of the situation? What if we took a cue from our loving dogs and didn't love based on how we feel, but rather because we chose to? Choose to love your significant other today regardless of the circumstances. Love them completely. It can drastically change a relationship to love this way.

Wouldn't you want to be in a relationship with someone who was always ecstatic to see you, forgave you quickly, was intensely loyal, and loved you unconditionally?

Dogs are so good at relationships because all they really want is to love you and to receive love. Everything stems from that. And at the end of the day, isn?t that what we all really want in life?
May God help us all
Do have a wonderful day.